This Is The Future You Deserve

In order to get the future you deserve, you must believe it into reality.

It’s not something tangible.  It’s a state of being.  When you reach it, you will feel the glow down to your very bones – but you’ll also realize that’s not so much an end game as a way of living your life from that day forward.  Everything finally clicks for you, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.  This click, this realization, this opening of your eyes to what truly matters – that is the future you’re searching for now, whether you know it or not.

You deserve to stand up tall and strong with a unshakable sense of your worth.  You will get there if you learn to focus on what really matters – not looking forward, not reminiscing, but staying entirely in the present moment.  Work on yourself in the here and now so that you end up with that beautiful future on your horizon.

You deserve to realize every one of your dreams.  They might shift and evolve as you travel through life, but as you grow you learn that reality is never what you expect.  Part of your perfect future is the ability to roll with whatever comes your way, handling it with grace and wisdom.  Nothing can stop you.  Nothing can tear you down.  You are the master of your own heart, your own soul, and your own choices.

You deserve to receive just as much love as you’ve always given, and you will.  When you learn to hold space for yourself and truly love yourself for all that you are, that love will multiply.  Your ability to care for others without condition will expand with your ability to care for your own spirit.  In the future, you’ll recognize that your failures and losses are nothing to hide – they built you into the independent and special person that you are.  Your heartbreaks taught you how to set boundaries, understand your true priorities when it comes to love, and never settle for someone who does not see your worth.  There was a purpose, a meaning to all of the madness. 

The truth is that you are in charge of building the future you deserve.  You can begin today, right in this moment.  You have the capability to bring all of your hopes and dreams into fruition, if you only believe in yourself.  And you, beautiful soul, deserve to know that you can achieve anything if you harness your own strength and determination.  

The future you deserve is whatever you want it to be.  

(Originally published on ThoughtCatalog.com)

You Are Capable Of Getting Over The Baggage In Your Past

You aren’t broken just because you’ve been through heartbreak.

The damage that you’ve sustained has nothing to do with who you are at your core. It has changed you, yes, and it’s shaped the way you approach love now. Sometimes you have to remember that not everyone will hurt you. It’s not always easy to get past the pain you experienced, but you try. All anyone can do is try, and keep trying, in the hopes that one day you finally let go of your fears. 

What matters most is your awareness of what’s happened in your history and your determination not to let it dictate the way your future turns out. You can stop yourself from allowing your insecurities and past experiences to ruin what you have in your life now. It’s impossible to discover if you’ve found something wonderful unless you let yourself go there. 

It’s not simple. You will make mistakes, and you will second guess yourself, and you will encounter frustration. Unfortunately, you may even lose someone great because you haven’t quite gotten over your baggage yet. It sucks, but it’s the only way that you learn what you don’t want to do again. 

Life isn’t always kind. Try to remember that everyone else has a past as well, and the right person will not judge you for yours.

Someday someone will come along who understands what you’ve been through and shows you patience. No matter what pitfalls, or struggles, or missteps, somehow they’ll stay. They will keep showing up day in and day out when no one else ever has. You’ll hardly believe that it’s possible. Every time, you assume they’ll run away, but they don’t. They make the decision to continue choosing you even when you are difficult and confusing. That person will show up for you until you finally believe that you’re worthy.  

Then you will finally understand what love is supposed to mean. 

Keep doing the work. The love will follow. 

(Originally published on ThoughtCatalog.com)

It’s Okay If The Love Of Your Life Isn’t Another Person

Once upon a time, you absorbed the notion that you have a single soulmate out there in the world, waiting for you.  You’re not sure where the idea originated – maybe from a book or a movie or maybe someone told you it was so.  You began to believe that you needed to find this person or your love life would never reach its potential.  If they did not materialize, you could not consider yourself whole.

Now as you move along your journey, reality sets in.  Maybe there’s not one single soulmate for you – and that’s okay.  In a way, it opens up your horizons to varied opportunities.  You’ve learned that love isn’t always what you think it’ll be.  It doesn’t have to manifest in a certain way.  Even if it isn’t a lasting romance, you always learn and grow from the experience.  Sure, you’re a bit disillusioned because your ideals were shattered – but that’s part of growing up.

With every ending, you begin looking inward.  You take time away from love, realizing you need to figure out who you are when you aren’t searching for someone else to distract you.  You’re not sure anymore if you have one true love, or many, or none at all.  Instead of constantly reaching for a person who will satisfy you, you start to learn about yourself and what you truly want from life.

In time, you actually enjoy being on your own.  You realize that discomfort means you’re evolving and that you don’t need a partner in order to experience your life to the fullest.  You appreciate every little idiosyncrasy that makes you a unique individual.  The best day you’ll ever have is the day that you look in the mirror and understand that the true love of your life is right there, smiling back at you.

It was you all along.  You were always enough.  The world tricked you into believing otherwise.

You become whole entirely within yourself.  For the first time, you’re truly happy, because you understand that love from another source isn’t meant to save you.  It’s a complement to the self-love you now embody proudly.  You’re in a place where you need no one else – and that is when you are finally ready to love someone in a healthy way. 

If you find a partner, wonderful.  If you don’t, you’ll be perfectly fine.  That’s the best position you could possibly experience both mentally and emotionally.  Not meeting someone will not disappoint you so badly and losing someone will no longer break you.  You worked through your harmful patterns and discovered a world of acceptance and joy. 

You only get this one life.  There’s no point in spending it dissatisfied with who you are and what you have.  Now that you realize the preciousness of your short time on this earth, you are no longer willing to waste it yearning over romance, regrets, and lost love.  Instead you choose, every single day, to appreciate the person you are and the life you possess, right here and now.

You’re the own damn love of your life.   And that’s a beautiful thing.  

(Originally published on ThoughtCatalog.com)